The Best Way to Ask Your Coach for Insight After Being Subbed Off

We’ve all been there before – the game is intense, you’re feeling an immense amount of pressure, but then everything starts to click. You have the other team’s number and you’re about to break them down. Then you hear the whistle and you’re getting subbed off.

Getting subbed off is always a frustrating moment – there’s no other way of going about it.

However, being subbed off can also be a very helpful moment in your soccer journey, depending on how you react to it. This is an opportunity to gain valuable information about your own strengths and weaknesses, and prove to your coach that you truly want to be a high-level player.

Here’s how to ask your coach for insights after being subbed off:

Don’t Ask “Why?” Right After You Get Subbed Off  

When being subbed off is a complete surprise, it’s only natural to get angry. It’s also only natural to want to know why your coach made this decision. That time will come, but right now, there’s a good chance you’re too emotional to engage in a civil two-way conversation.

Players often make the mistake of angrily asking their coaches why they were subbed off immediately after it happens or simply storm off and sulk. Asking for a conversation right then is the wrong thing to do – your coach is coaching the whole team, not just you. Distracting them from the game is not going to do anyone any benefit.

So, don’t attempt to ask your coach for an explanation right after being subbed off. Instead, take some time to process your emotions and try to understand the logic behind the coach’s decision. You have to be able to ask your coach with a cool head where they don’t just think you are looking for an argument. The general rule of thumb is to at least wait 24 hours from the end of the game before reaching out.

Don’t Come from a Place of Anger

When reaching out to your coach, it’s important to take an inquisitive stance. Make it very clear that you are not trying to argue. You are genuinely asking for help because you want to improve your game and be a better teammate.

Also, go into the conversation under the mentality that your coach made the correct decision. Whether they were right or not isn’t important for this conversation – they’re in charge of the team and challenging their decision is going to stop you from getting any value in this conversation.

If your coach was right to sub you off, it means there are holes in your game that need to be fixed, since they’re clearly affecting your performance. Identifying your weaknesses is crucial for your evolution, so you’re doing yourself a huge favor by reaching out to your coach and asking for this valuable information.

Show That You’re Coachable  

If you don’t already have a solid relationship with your coach, this is the perfect time to start. Your coach is more likely to share helpful advice on a consistent basis when you take the initiative to show that you truly want to be coached. A coachable player puts the team first, and doesn’t let their emotions get in the way of the team’s success.

If you show your coach that you can take criticism without getting overly emotional and incorporate their advice into your play, they will be more inclined to coach you going forward. Every player experiences adversity in some form, and now your coach doesn’t have to worry about how you’ll react when the next obstacle arises.

At Beyond Goals Mentoring, we know how hard it is to stay focused and motivated after a setback in your journey – no matter how small. That’s why we’re dedicated to helping young athletes develop the mental tools to not only overcome adversity, but to accept adversity as an ongoing part of an athlete’s life.

As former pros, we learned very early in our careers that the ability to recover from setbacks is easily one of the most important skills an athlete can possess. What seems like a bad thing is really an opportunity for your athlete to learn this crucial skill.

So, if your athlete is having trouble recovering from a recent setback, let’s set up a mentoring session today.